Today I was walking home from getting some lunch, and I saw something I hadn’t seen before. I saw a sweaty, shirtless man running down the street with two shiny, bouncing nipple rings. It occurs to me now this site is probably a fairly regular thing in some places, including Atlanta’s own Piedmont Park, but somehow I have gone this long without witnessing it.

Then it occurred to me that these were very shiny rings. These rings weren’t just pieces of body jewelry this man left in full time. They were recently polished silver nipple rings, glinting in the sun from yards away. Perhaps the guy has an assortment of nipple decorations. Maybe there are formal, casual, and exercise nipple rings? Maybe it isn’t just nipple rings, and he has a whole sexual organ body modification wardrobe for any occasions.